We have spent a month talking about the need to speak in a civil manner when we disagree. Based on the responses I received, it seems that there is a general consensus on a theoretical level to treat others respectfully regardless of the disagreement.
There is probably no topic that can put our theoretical agreement to the test more than the above statement. (Maybe I should have started with the toilet paper conflict.) Yes, I realize I am stepping into deep waters here, and again acknowledge that I am not an authority but just a fellow traveler. This will be an opportunity for us to test our ability to discuss a difficult topic, look at various points of view and interact without attacking the ones with whom we disagree. I plan to just take baby steps and slowly walk through this topic.
Going back to a previous post, I need to ask this question of each of us. What story did you tell yourself when you read those three words? For good or bad, we do use a filter based on our experiences and education to interpret everything. It is my guess that for most of us, we didn’t just dwell on those words.
It is very rare in today’s world to run into someone who will say that black lives don’t matter. It is my contention that the words themselves don’t cause such varied and conflicting responses, but the filter we are using.
[Quick detour] To be fair, I do need to acknowledge that as recent as the 60’s there are plenty of examples especially in the South in which it is obvious both by the actions and rhetoric, that black lives did not matter to many. [End of detour]
Instead of just thinking of the words “black lives matter,” we choose sides based on beliefs and opinions that we hold. Maybe we thought about an organization that has founders who have claimed to be trained Marxists or maybe we thought about a group of people who claim to be marginalized. Maybe we thought about those who have rioted or looted or maybe we have thought about those who because of the perceived pain of themselves or others have chosen to protest peacefully. Maybe we thought of people who we perceive always play the race card or the victim card. Maybe we thought of people who think that all policemen are racists or bigots. Or maybe we thought of someone we know who has expressed their pain to us.
Hopefully, we can all see that what we thought of when we read those words has a massive effect on how we respond.
I said I would just be taking baby steps in discussing this topic–so that is all for this week. I hope that asking ourselves that question will enable us to acknowledge that not everyone saying those words, means the same thing. And knowing that, by God’s grace maybe we can respond with more grace.